>05/11/2007 15:11:00 Monday, 05 November 2007

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I ran out of Tegretol on Friday night without realising it so that, on Saturday night, I suddenly had none and had to go through two days without it.

This shouldn’t have made much difference to my life but it did.

On Sunday night I was very twitchy and odd and couldn’t sleep. I had the runs and felt odd. I kept smelling a strange ‘old fashioned’ metallic type smell which I can only presume was an aura… It smelt like one of those smells you have smelt before. It wasn’t anything I could pin down.

I couldn’t sleep or stay in bed very long and I started to feel panicky. I finally slept at 7.30am until 10.30am when I woke up even more agitated and soaked with sweat.

I was distressed and couldn’t talk slowly or clearly or look any one in the eye for more than a split second.

I had no calling credit and my phone was off for anything other than emergencies but, luckily someone had lent me a car so I drove down to the surgery and asked to speak to the receptionists privately. They let me through into the back room and I sat, sweating and mumbling about my pills and feeling weird.

They got me into see the doctor whose name I have forgotten already and she has arranged for me to see my doctor on Wednesday morning.

My blood pressure was 163 over 90 which was what it dropped down to before I left hospital in December 2006 after my heart attack.

I wasn’t on any other drugs at the time.

This episode seems to have been caused solely by the stress of my upcoming tribunal and the removal of Tegretol – a mood stabiliser and anti seizure drug which was added to my list of drugs a few years back when it was found that the Epilim on it’s own did not stop my fits… A friend pointed out that the sort I take is not the time release variety I asked for a few years back when this same problem kept cropping up because of my, then, worse state of mental health.

I took 600mg of Tegretol straight away (my normal evening dose – it was initially set at 1800mg when first prescribed but my head felt so bad I had to cut it down to the dose that makes me fit free without feeling ill) and went and sat with a friend and had a hot drink.

Within an hour I was at the other end of the scale and talking non stop – hyper. But feeling much better. Three hours later my physical side crashed and I am now at home resting… my mind is still racing but is slowing down.

18:39:28

Woke up after a sleep feeling muggy, drained and tired.

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